Narcissism as a Spiritual Illness: The Nafs, Shaytaan, Trauma, and the Descent into Darkness

In Islam, we understand that the nafs—the self or soul—is not just a psychological entity, but a spiritual one. It is through the state of our nafs that we align ourselves with Allah, seek purification, or, unfortunately, allow ourselves to fall into darkness. Narcissism, with its root in self-centeredness, arrogance, and lack of empathy, can be viewed as a spiritual illness that is deeply connected to a person being entrenched in the lowest level of the nafs—the nafs al-ammara bi-suu (the commanding soul to evil). This form of the soul is the most susceptible to the whispers of Shaytaan (Satan), who plays a central role in fostering these destructive traits.

The Nafs and Its Stages

Islamic teachings describe the nafs as having three primary stages:

1. Nafs al-Ammara bi-Suu (The Soul That Commands Evil)

2. Nafs al-Lawwama (The Blaming Soul)

3. Nafs al-Mutma’inna (The Soul at Peace)

The nafs al-ammara bi-suu is the lowest, most primal state of the self, constantly pulling an individual towards selfish desires, egoism, and sinful behaviours. This is the state in which narcissism thrives.

Narcissism and the Nafs al-Ammara bi-Suu

At the core of narcissistic behaviour is a deep, almost pathological need for validation and a lack of genuine empathy for others. The narcissist is driven by an inflated sense of self-importance and a distorted perception of their value, often elevating themselves above others. This reflects the behavior of someone who is firmly entrenched in their nafs al-ammara bi-suu, a self that is ruled by arrogance, greed, and self-obsession.

The nafs al-ammara is the part of us that compels us to seek only our own benefit, at the expense of others. It creates a cycle where the individual’s desire for power, admiration, and control over others becomes the primary focus. In this state, one sees others as mere tools or instruments to feed their ego, disregarding the humanity and feelings of others. Narcissists are often completely disconnected from the concept of shared humanity or compassion because they are operating solely on this lowest level of the soul.

Shaytaan’s Role in Narcissism

Shaytaan, the sworn enemy of humanity, is deeply influential in guiding individuals who are dominated by the nafs al-ammara. The Qur’an clearly highlights Shaytaan’s role in misguiding and leading astray those whose hearts are inclined toward arrogance and pride. In Surah Al-A’raf (7:16-17), Shaytaan says:

“Because You have led me astray, I will surely sit in wait for them on Your straight path. Then I will come to them from before them and from behind them and on their right and on their left, and You will not find most of them grateful.”

Shaytaan’s primary tool is his ability to whisper lies into the hearts of those who have opened the door to arrogance, selfishness, and pride. The narcissist is particularly vulnerable to these whispers because of their intense need to feel superior and entitled. Shaytaan feeds these thoughts, encouraging them to believe they are special, deserving of everything, and that others exist solely for their benefit.

Shaytaan pushes them to justify their harmful actions, to dismiss the pain they cause others, and to believe that they are beyond reproach. Narcissists are often unable to self-reflect or feel guilt because Shaytaan has clouded their hearts, making it difficult for them to recognise the harm they inflict on others. Their pride, unchecked by self-awareness, prevents them from acknowledging their flaws, and instead, they project their faults onto those around them, furthering the cycle of abuse.

Narcissism and Trauma: A Gateway for Shaytaan

It is essential to recognize that narcissism is not a purely intrinsic character flaw; in many cases, it stems from deep and unresolved trauma. Narcissistic traits often develop as a defence mechanism in response to early life wounds such as emotional neglect, abuse, or abandonment. These experiences create gaping emotional wounds within the individual, which they seek to protect by constructing a false sense of superiority and detachment from their feelings of vulnerability.

In this state of emotional fragility and weakness, Shaytaan finds an opening. Rather than guiding the individual towards healing, Shaytaan whispers into their ears, using the pain of the past as a means to further entrench them in self-absorption and pride. Rather than seeking help, self-compassion, or spiritual growth, the individual adopts a facade of control and dominance, attempting to block out the pain with an inflated ego and a belief that they are superior to others.

This process of self-deception feeds the narcissist’s behaviour, making them more entrenched in their narcissistic patterns and less able to confront their trauma. The more they reject their vulnerability, the more their behaviour is influenced by Shaytaan’s whispers. Narcissism, then, becomes a spiritual illness born from unhealed wounds, magnified by the demonic influence of Shaytaan, who encourages them to keep building walls around their pain.

Therapy and Spiritual Healing: Addressing the Root Cause

As with all spiritual ailments, true healing requires both psychological and spiritual intervention. While the narcissist’s behavior may stem from deep trauma, it is essential to address both the emotional wounds and the spiritual disconnection. Therapy plays a crucial role in helping the narcissist confront and process their past trauma, healing emotional scars that may have been buried for years. Therapy provides the tools needed to develop self-awareness, emotional regulation, and healthy coping mechanisms, allowing the individual to work through their vulnerabilities in a way that is constructive rather than destructive.

However, therapy alone is not enough. Spiritual healing is also essential. Tawbah (repentance) is crucial for any soul that has strayed from the path of Allah, and the narcissist must sincerely repent, recognising their ego, pride, and harm caused to others. They must turn to Allah, ask for forgiveness, and make a commitment to correct their ways.

Dhikr (remembrance of Allah) can be an important tool in bringing the heart back to a state of humility. By regularly engaging in remembrance, the individual is reminded of their smallness before Allah and the infinite greatness of Allah. This serves to counteract the pride and self-obsession that lies at the root of narcissistic behaviour.

Ultimately, true healing involves humbling the self and allowing Allah to purify the heart. This is the antidote to the nafs al-ammara bi-suu, which thrives on arrogance and pride.

Narcissism is not just a psychological disorder—it is a spiritual affliction that keeps individuals trapped in the darkness of their lower selves. It is a condition that prevents them from aligning with Allah’s teachings of humility, empathy, and selflessness. The narcissist is influenced by the whispers of Shaytaan, who feeds their pride and arrogance, creating a cycle of emotional manipulation and spiritual stagnation. Breaking free from this destructive pattern requires a return to Allah, purification of the soul, and a deep commitment to humbling oneself in His presence.

Additionally, recognising that narcissism often arises from unresolved trauma highlights the importance of addressing these past wounds through both therapy and spiritual healing. It is only through a combination of both that true healing can occur—allowing the individual to break free from the grip of narcissism and reconnect with their true self and Allah.

May Allah guide us all to humility, sincerity, and the purification of our hearts, and protect us from the whispers of Shaytaan. Ameen.